life in the south

on my drive home from work this evening I began to think that maybe I ought to write about what my life is like here - what I've been up to. Some of you may be expecting that. I don't always feel like words are the best method for me - that's why I'm a visual artist, but i'll give it a go. i'd also just rather not use caps anywhere. so i won't.


on to more joyful things

The new job, Shu at Saks, is pretty great. I'm definitely much less stressed than I was before. Today was the most stressful day I have had so far, and it was really nothing. I am just amazed at how any successful company can be so unorganized sometimes. Or they try something new that is really worse than the old way. I'm not adverse to change, but there are things that are obviously not going to work. Makes we want to work for myself, or have my own company.

I do get to go to Boca Raton, Florida, for a week for training in February. And, they've been gracious enough to get my return flight for the Sunday following our week of training so I can spend the weekend in South Beach with Brandon. A free mini-vacation, which is fantastic, since I won't have vacation days until July.

Sam is in Chicago now for work. I really don't know how I feel about it. Well, it's not about him being in Chicago.... I don't like that he isn't here much anymore, but that's just how it is with his job - so I suppose it is better than hong kong. it just brings up feelings of - what if i had stayed in chicago? but that's silly. i needed to get out - and i don't regret it. i'm at a point where i am here - there is no time but the present. this is what i'm doing. i don't know how long i will stay in atlanta. who knows anything or where life will take us. i'm pretty content at the moment for the most part. of course i miss people, but i've grown accustomed to that. would i be happy or happier if i went back to chicago? who can say. would i be happier if Sam was always here? if all my friends lived here? obviously, yes - but that's not how it is.

i feel quite fortunate that i have met some amazing and quality people here. i've been to more parties here than i ever went to in the 8 years i lived in chicago. not that that is important, but it is nice - and fun. better way to meet and get to know people say over a bar.

i'm re-reading a book that i won't mention the title of - i don't want it to seem like i've gone all new age or something. but it is helpful at times. some of what has been helping me recently is:

"if you cling to nothing, you can deal with anything." that may sound a little cynical, but it isn't meant to be. it's more about being in the present moment and enjoying everything.

"always maintain a joyful mind." hard to do, but not impossible.

"don't wallow in self-pity" imperative for me.

"if it looks like wisdom, but it is unkind rather than loving, it's not wisdom."

and

"if it feels like love, but it's not wise, it's not love." that is sometimes a hard one for me.

so, i spend a lot of time alone - well, not that much really - but more than i'd like sometimes. so i'm getting a cat. i have sam convinced. i told him, look, if you're going to be in chicago for the next year, i need and want a cat. i always have really. i may go to the humane society tomorrow and look. i like the name dharma, although i hesitate to use that because i don't want people to think it is in reference to dharma from dharma and greg. any ideas?

i've been using my cameras a lot more often as well. which feels good. early on, william and bryan would hand me their camera when we would be out and i'd snap away all night. eventually, i started taking my own. so comes the question of ownership in photography. i took most all these pictures, but some with other's cameras. anyway - at least i'm shooting again. that's all i can say about that right now. i should attempt to post with some sort of theme, but really i just look through all my photos and put up what i feel like putting up at the moment.

oh, and i got my first tatoo not too long after i got here. there will be more at some point probably.

it's going to be 70 degrees tomorrow. that's fantastic. i'm helping my friend brian move. then who knows. maybe i'll find more time to blog.